self preservation from anxiety

Self-Preservation from Anxiety and Depression

Some days, living with anxiety and depression consumes all of our energy. To the outside world, we might appear lazy on these days. But in many cases, we’re waging a battle with ourselves to find some peace. Facing the world can be a daunting experience when we’re suffering. This story is about what one of […]

Panic in the Night

Panic in the Night

  3:19 am –  “Why do I always get stuck with this?! Eff me.” Tossing over onto his back, he felt the fear rising up the back of his neck and yanked his blanket up over his legs. “Eff me.  Eff me. Eff me. I don’t wanna deal with this today. I don’t need this […]

Medications And Living A Normal Life With Anxiety & Depression

Medications And Living A Normal Life With Anxiety & Depression

Every night about this time, I have to take two pills. One, the big round white one, helps me to relax and go to sleep. The little pale green oval is supposed to make the pills I take in the morning work better. To amplify their effects. Supposedly. The pills in the morning, two blue […]

Written Meditation- Sky Meditation

Written Meditation: Sky Meditation

A teacher of mine gave me the basis for this meditation. I’ve used it many times when I’ve felt overwhelmed or anxious. It’s good for times when you feel like a problem is too big for you or when something that’s bothering you is larger than life. I prefer to use it as a walking […]

The Comfort In Depression

The Comfort In Depression

                  “I hate myself. I’m never going to get better,” I’ve thought to myself ten thousand times. The unfortunate reality for many people with depression, myself included, is that they’re used to feeling depressed. It’s become the “normal” way of life. Every part of your being revolves […]

Life With Depression, An Open Letter to My Pillow, Blanket and Couch

Life With Depression, An Open Letter to My Pillow, Blanket and Couch

We’ve been together for a long time now and I just wanted to say aloud the things I’ve held in my heart about you. Pillow, you comfort me when nothing else will bring me relaxation. Cradling my restless head, you bring me the escape of sleep. You silence the cacophony of the outside world when I […]

Thich Nhat Hanh

12 Thich Nhat Hanh Quotes that Will Bring You Inner Peace

Thich Nhat Hanh, a writer, monk, spiritual leader that’s known as the ‘The Father of Mindfulness” has influenced countless of people around the world sharing the teachings of Buddhism. He continues to enlighten us with his wisdom on peace and mindfulness. When I am having a rough day and feeling agitated, and restless, I often […]

My thoughts after my first day at the Pennsylvania Psychiatric Institute

My Thoughts After My First Day At The Pennsylvania Psychiatric Institute

Last month my wife took me to the local emergency room because over the previous two weeks, the occasional suicidal thoughts I was having were becoming strong, instantaneous impulses to kill myself. The morning I went to the ER, I was holding a saw in my hand when one of these impulses hit. I looked at my other […]


Knowing When To Act

You’ve got this Zen stuff down. You are calm and responsible. You approach problems logically, without letting emotions take over. You treat people with respect and honesty. You meditate regularly and your mind is trained to be able to relax in the face of any stressor. You are completely satisfied with your ability to soothe […]

how to regain control

How To Regain Control

The easiest way to let your misfortunes ruin everything else is to lose control while you’re half way through dealing with them. When things get difficult, it’s easy to let all the negative emotions pile up on top of you to the point that they stop you from changing things. They ruin your motivation. They […]