Dating is a complicated process for all of us looking for love, and it can become even more difficult if you don’t conform to society’s standards of beauty. Unfortunately, you can’t exactly avoid dating if you want to find the one. What you can do, though, is introduce more body positivity into your dating life, and here’s how you can do just that.
Never be with somebody if it feels like they are doing you a favour by dating you. You don’t need such favours, and you deserve to be loved and respected just like everybody else. Besides, love is a two-way street and if you don’t love your partner, or if your partner doesn’t love you, then you’re not in a healthy relationship. Body-positivity is not just about accepting who you are but also about not engaging in relationships that you don’t want to be in and knowing your worth. Emotional connection is just as important as the physical one, and if either one is lacking, you’re not with the right person.
Of course, compromises are a part of every healthy relationship ‒ but only when they benefit both sides. If your partner is asking you to lose weight or change your appearance in any other way just so you could be “more attractive”, then that’s not really about you, is it? If you want to get a haircut or let your hair grow, by all means, go ahead. If you don’t really like wearing a lot of makeup, that is again your choice, and no man or woman should tell you what to do with your own body. Also, don’t let your partner make you feel guilty about that second slice of pizza or another scoop of ice cream. When it comes to love vs. lust, the difference can sometimes be hard to figure out. However, trying to control you in any way only shows that they can’t accept you for who you really are, and thus, do not truly love you. So, instead of wasting your time, move on to somebody who will know how to treat you the way you deserve to be treated.
BELIEVE WHAT YOU HEAR
If your partner tells you that you look great ‒ believe them! No matter how difficult it might be, put your insecurities aside and trust them. They are openly expressing their attraction towards you, and they are supporting you, so nothing else should matter. If despite your best efforts, you still have some doubts about what they are telling you, the best way to get rid of those doubts is to communicate and listen. If you learn to believe them and accept the fact that they love you for who you are, you’ll be on the right path to a healthy and body-positive relationship.
THE SUPPORT SHOULD GO BOTH WAYS
If your partner supports you, it goes without saying that you should support them as well. Regardless of their physique, everybody has some insecurities when it comes to their body. Don’t mock their concerns just because you think they have nothing to worry about. Be there for them the same way they are for you, and keep showing them that you are attracted to them and that you love them.
SPEND TIME WITH OTHER BODY-POSITIVE PEOPLE
The good thing about learning how to incorporate body-positivity into your lifestyle is that you are not alone. There are many amazing women out there who are just like you and who can show you how to love yourself and how to ignore the imposed beauty ideals. It’s not hard to feel lonely or hopeless in a society that is judgemental of everything that deviates from the norm even a bit. For that reason, it is extremely important to surround yourself with positive people as well as images and words that will help you regain confidence and learn how to love your body together with all its “flaws”.
No matter where you are and who you are with, you are on your own journey to finding a healthy relationship that includes both physical and emotional satisfaction. Finally, accepting yourself and celebrating your own form of beauty will allow you to see the world ‒ and love ‒ from a whole new perspective.
Author Bi0 – Georgia Selih is author highstylife. By nature an artist, by profession a journalist. An irreparable print lover who is enjoying this hot digital affair.