I understand the slog. I know the shift back out of depression into greatness can seem tough. Remember it will all be worth it in the end.
Know that when you feel like just thinking is hard work, I understand. And that when someone asks you a question and a one word answer is a challenge, it’s ok. It’s normal. Don’t judge yourself; it’s perfectly natural to feel like this and there are plenty of people out there who understand. Accept your situation, and yourself.
Know that all in all you have the ability to heal right now! Your willingness to heal is what will make you feel better again. The more you go for it and put yourself out there the greater you will heal. Focusing on the good, focusing on solutions and focusing on positive feelings are key.
You may have huge resistance to over come this but stick through it and you’ll see it pass.
Here are some ideas to help you get back on track, back to feeling like you again:
- Have a focus of your day; Do 1 productive thing and 1 thing you love every day.
This does not have to be huge. When I was feeling like this sometimes my one productive thing was doing the washing up. It made me feel successful and productive and that something was done and my day had a point. Take enjoyment that it is all clean and you got it done!
One thing you love is anything, on any scale that you love and can handle that day, for example sometimes I would dance, sometimes I would practise yoga, sometimes I would take a nap when I needed to in kindness to myself, sometimes I would draw.
- Spruce up your self-care regime: look after yourself everyday! You are worth it!
Long baths with bath salts and essential oils, painting my nails, moisturising my whole body and letting it all sink in, putting together a nice outfit for the day…
- Cultivate mindfulness. This one is KEY and a great stepping stone to healing. With mindfulness you can find out the thoughts you are thinking and step into your higher-self and overcome any negativity. Your higher self wants what is best for you and once you start hearing it you can make empowering change. To learn how to do this I recommend buying a book (Mindfulness Made Easy – Martha Langley is great) or checking out other blogs on this website.
Put yourself first. Who are you putting first in your life? It is SO, SO important to look after yourself and put your needs before you assess others. It’s not selfish; you are important! Your feelings are SO important! Once you look after yourself and don’t expect other people to, you can rejuvenate and be on top form for service and put the best you forward. Your best mood will benefit your relationships so much!
Take a break to just BE. From here just do what intuitively feels right. Maybe you’d like to sit still, draw, move, vent, stretch, stare out the window. Just do what you feel you need to do.
Journal. This is a big one and so worth your time. Writing everything down can be very therapeutic. Write down every thought, every single thought without judgement. Write down all those things you feel fearful of. Write down things you think but would never say to someone else. Write and release!
Remember times you felt more positive. What were you doing? Write down those memories in as much detail as you can. Then give thanks.
Gratitude journaling. Be grateful for 5 things everyday and write them down. Really feel the gratitude from your heart and great things will be coming to you!
Treat yourself to a massage, flowers, your favourite tea, a trip to the theatre!
Dance! Movement of any kind is expressive and healing. You can do this in your own room or join an expressive dance class. I did this once, one day when I had a suicidal thought and I knew I Had to dance. The movement took me to a totally different place. Movement is expressive and it can be so helpful to dance those feelings you don’t know how to express in words. Or if you feel a bit suppressed with words. Check out: www.5rhythms.com
Do something relaxing. This might involve taking a long walk in the woods, sit on the beach, anywhere in nature. This energy is great and very healing. Make a day of it.
Breathing Practise to quieten your mind. In for 4, hold for 4, out for 6.
Make up your mantra! I will feel better and better and better. Everyday in everyway I feel better and better.
Work out! The post work out feeling will have you feeling great. Some ideas are go for a run, do dance aerobics in your room. If you are feeling a bit un motivated I suggest going to a class the local gym- the instructor and the class energy will keep you motivated.
Do that hobby you love- if it means taking a class or doing it at home, do it!
Join support networks in your local area.
Set boundaries- say no and stick to it! Be true to yourself and honour your feelings! It doesn’t matter what other people think/
Stand up for yourself, if something doesn’t feel good to you, you don’t have to let it be part of your life. You can say no, talk about it but ultimately if someone doesn’t show you the respect you deserve, you can leave.
Give yourself a hug! A really long, squeezy, bear hug! Wrap your arms round your shoulders so tight! Research has shown your brain benefits from hugs and it does not recognise the difference between you giving yourself a hug or someone else doing it. The benefits are equally great.
Holistic Therapies. There’s so many to write about- Googles your best friend (search holistic therapies –your area and see what comes up).
Eat well! I don’t know the scientific evidence of food and overcoming depression. However I do know that this is a great tool for self care and you always feel better after eating a plate of whole foods over fast food. I found my body feels lighter, cleaner and more ‘ready for action’. What do you eat?
Do Yoga. It is great for relaxation and sets you up for a great sleep.
Do Pilates. This is a great class to take to help you feel empowered as all the exercises come from the core. Take a class or if taking a class in impractical for you, there are great videos on YouTube.
Take a look at your self esteem (can be a tough one). You ARE AMAZING! You were made by the divine. Look for all the ways you are amazing?
Do something entirely for someone else’s benifit.
Look at your career: are you passionate about it? The best decision I ever made was to leave university after studying for 2 year and spending loads of fees. People got this totally and supported me or they thought I was crazy. Either way I am now a dance coach and it brings me so much joy and meaning. Your job is something you do every day and you will do it for a long time of your life; make it something you love! Know that if you’re truly passionate about something, it will work out for you.
Make a vision board. Make it about your entire life, what your doing, where you are, what job you have, what your relationships like, is there romance, is there fun, is there lots of expression, is their lots of support, happiness and love? What is your schedule like? How much free time do you have? Do you have fun? Do you go on holidays? Where to? Where do you live? Is your life full of passion and joy?
Imagine what can be and all that is possible (and the law of attraction states if you can believe it, you can do it!) How does it feel to have all those great things?
What are your action steps to have that vision board as your life? What are the long term goals and what can you do every day to get there? If you need some help with this talk to a friend. If you don’t want to share your ideas to a friend, phone a talk line. They can listen and will help you. There are some numbers you can call at the bottom of this article.
Know you are your own authority. You have ultimate control over the direction of your life.
Take your time to heal, no one is timing you, there’s no race. All in your own time, when you are ready.
Please know you will probably feel some resistance (maybe feeling angry) and know this is natural and ok and you should accept it. It’s a sure fire sign you are healing!
Know that there may still be good days and bad days but as long as you are willing to heal you are doing the best you possibly can!
Please Avoid things such as alcohol, cigarettes or binge eating comfort foods. Yes they feel like help but they are a short term remedy and don’t fix the situation or bring you up.
Prayers and all the hugs and support for you on your healing journey!
Samaritians Helpline : 08457 909090 or if you find it easier to write you can email them at email@example.com (however I found this slower. If you need someone to talk to urgently their service much quicker to call them and you can generally speak to someone right away.)
No Limits UK : 02380 224 224. firstname.lastname@example.org
Helpline: 0844 477 5774, Monday-Friday, 9:30am-5:30am
Helpline: 0845 767 8000, every day, 1:00pm-11:00pm
Author Bio – Vikki is a dancer, fashionista and artist. She overcame a deep depression herself and is passionate about helping others do the same. She lives in England with friends.